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FANS ANTICIPATING NEXT HUMAN SACRIFICE AND BLOOD BATH FROM LADY GAGA
January 5 2012
London, U.K. – Rock stars are wacky, crazy folk. They indulge in indulgent behaviour, partly to bulk up their reputation, partly because they are able to do so. Having money and fawning consorts wherever one goes tends to make people believe they can do anything they want, and rock stars often do just that.
The history of rock music, music of all kinds really, is replete with crazy behaviour from stars, everything from weird sex fetishes to passion over M&M colours and everything in between. Now one star may have taken things to a new level, as she often does, after a blood filled bathtub was found left by Lady Gaga at a London hotel.
“Lady Gaga left large amounts of blood in the suite during a stay this summer. The incident was reported to the concierge, who was told to put it out of her mind,” said an insider at the hotel. “All of the hotel’s staff are convinced she was bathing in. Or, at the very least, using it as part of one of her new costumes or weird stage routines.”
The incident occurred last summer and does not appear to have repeated since then, indicating that the Gaga has stopped human sacrifice or simply remembered to drain the tub afterwards.
Most incidents of human sacrifice have religious overtones, satanic in Christian tradition or for good harvest in others. It’s not clear if Gaga has any interest in bettering the harvest as she has no background in farming.
The bath tub in question was cleaned so it is not precisely clear why employees are complaining.
“Rock stars have to be rock stars. It would be really boring without them to be honest and like everything, Gaga has to up the ante. I mean who would have thought that her hotel room behaviour would have been normal. That just wouldn’t have been Gaga, she has to take it to another level and that’s what she did,” said Scrape TV Music analyst Dylan Chambers. “She could be sacrificing animals or human babies or virgins. We really don’t know, and that’s the key to the whole thing. We don’t know and it gets people talking. It’s a shame that people have to resort to leaving bathtubs full of blood to get attention, but that’s the world we live in today.”
There were no reported disappearances in London in and around the time Gaga was performing, though she could easily have lured homeless people into her hotel room and sacrificed them there.
“There really isn’t a smoking gun here. If someday someone smells something awful in the room and they tear down the walls finding desiccated corpses inside, that will be a smoking gun, but until then it is just a bunch of blood, and mostly a rumour,” continued Chambers. “If it weren’t Gaga, who loves the attention obviously, it would be sad that someone couldn’t bathe in blood without it being spilled all over the news. It is Gaga though, and she loves her attention. And blood I guess, lot’s of it apparently.”
There were no reports of organs or bones, meaning that blood could have been purchased, that the sacrifice were made elsewhere, or that Gaga may also be a cannibal.
Samantha Dryden, Entertainment Correspondent
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