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NEWS > EVERYONE ELSE > CANADA RAILS AGAINST IRAN; IRAN IS LIKE WHY YOU HATIN’ CANADA?
CANADA RAILS AGAINST IRAN; IRAN IS LIKE WHY YOU HATIN’ CANADA?
October 16 2011
Ottawa, Canada – It’s difficult to understand what exactly is going in Iran. There is perhaps no country in history that has gone so out of its way to irritate the world as Iran has done over the last few decades, isolating from most of the planet. Normally such segregations are a result of differing ideologies, but with Iran it seems that they make an effort to become a villain, that they in fact relish it.
Iran does have some limited support around the world, even from major countries like Russia and China, but they have more enemies than allies, a disparity that continues to grow and grow and grow.
Now Iran has fallen afoul of yet another country, one that on the surface makes some sense but one that rarely, if ever, expresses dislike for anyone. With a speech on Friday, in reference to the apparent assassination plot by the Iranian government, Canadian Prime Minister came down firmly against the leadership in that country, prompting Iranian officials to respond with shock and surprise and trying to find just what the heck is up with Canada.
“We have no quarrel with the Iranian people, but the regime in Tehran represents probably the most significant threat in the world to global peace and security,” Harper said, a sentiment echoed by other members of his government. 
Iran has been widely criticized for the foiled assassination plot which would have killed the Saudi Ambassador to the United States.
Canada has long stood alongside traditional American enemies such as Cuba and Iraq, and even sent food and clothing to villain North Korea, but this new stance falls firmly in line with the U.S. line, which has apparently shocked the Iranian government.
“Frankly, we did not know it was possible to make enemies with the Canada. They seem like such a pleasant and accommodating people. Many Iranians live in Canada, both friends of the government and ones who are not friends, which makes this all the more confusing,” said an Iranian insider. “We are very much taken back by these words. We expected such talk from America, but not Canada and it is a little distressing. Just a little distressing, yes, but distressing nonetheless. Hopefully these words do not harm our long term relations with the Canada.”
Canada does participate in limiting supplies to Iran, though they have no significant trade with the country.
“This is certainly not what we wanted, for any reason. The policy of Iran does not work in reaction to the actions of other nations, whether real or anticipated, no matter the country. Well, maybe Russia and China, but no one else. Well, maybe the U.S. and Europe, and Israel, but no one else and so there is little we can do here, but it is sad,” continued the insider. “We had no quarrel with the Canadian government or the people there but I guess we do now. I guess they are now a western devil who seeks to destroy the sovereignty of the Iranian people and like all others who oppose us they will have to be destroyed. This is a sad day to be sure.”
The Iranian ambassador to Canada was like “Yo, I don’t even know.”
Emil Uliya, International Correspondent
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