U.S.A.
Everyone Else
Health
Science
Business
Technology
Sports
Video Games
Entertainment
Future
Humour
NEWS > HEALTH > GIANT HOGWEED INVASION BELIEVED TO HAVE STARTED IN NORWAY
GIANT HOGWEED INVASION BELIEVED TO HAVE STARTED IN NORWAY
July 8 2011
Albany, NY – No matter how many bombs we create, no matter how sophisticated our guns, and no matter how powerful our militaries become there is still very little we are able to do about nature. In everything we have done nature always has a way to 
trump human beings. We have succeeded in remarkable ways, better than any other species that has ever lived on this planet, but nature has proven time and time again that when it chooses it can simply wipe us all away.
Even if we are able to stand up against tornadoes, earthquakes, hurricanes, viruses, and tsunamis nature can still one-up us. It can slam a meteorite into the earth’s surface or, as it will, kill our sun and destroy ever remnant of life on the planet. Nature has power beyond anything we can comprehend and just as we think we are bettering the odds, she comes back with something even more devastating. That is something the people of New York States are finding out the hard way as a new killer plant begins to invade the area. The giant hogweed, native to central Asia, has begun to sprout across the New York with sap capable of burning, blistering, and even blinding. Now as officials try to stop the spread of the dread plant investigators are starting to look for a cause of the infestation and believed they have tracked it, to Norway.
“This is a very dangerous plant and we urge anyone who encounters it to not only stay far away but to also call our emergency hotline. We have experts on duty 24 hours a day ready to respond to any spotting of these plants. Please do not try to 
deal with them yourselves,” said a spokesperson for the Health and Human services department. “This is an extremely toxic plant which can cause serious injury with even the slightest touch. Please, call us and we will deal with any incidents you might come across.”
Giant hogweed infestations have been identified in at least 944 sites, but that number could expand before those areas are contained.
“We are encouraging people to remain diligent and cautious, but not to panic. Stay away from these plants and please keep children away, but there is no reason to panic. The plants are firmly rooted in the ground and simply not capable of giving chase. Walking away from the plants at normal walking speed will give you plenty of time to get away,” continued the spokesperson. “We believe we have been able to track the source of the infestation. We believe the plants came over from Norway. That country has also been suffering a widespread situation with the plants and we believe that they simply lost control of the plants which were transported here either by accident or on purpose. To what end we are not sure but we have sent our information to the FBI.”
Norway, meanwhile, is laying the blame squarely at the feet of New Yorkers.
“We are nowhere close to Asia and we have no reason to attack that state or the United States. This is not in the best interests of our country or of the people of Norway. This is not something we did and we reject any assertion to the opposite,” said a spokesperson for the Norwegian government, a little too forcefully. “This is a serious concern to the Norwegian people and has made many people ill. We are not inclined to begin a fight with anyone over blame but instead are concentrating on eradicating this menace from our shores, no matter how it was delivered here.”
Norwegians have also been asked to walk away from any infestations, quickly but without running.
Lauren Hebert, Health Correspondent
NEWS > HEALTH > GIANT HOGWEED INVASION BELIEVED TO HAVE STARTED IN NORWAY
LINK IT! http://scrapetv.com/News/News%20Pages/Health/pages-2/Giant-hogweed-invasion-believed-to-have-started-in-Norway-Scrape-TV-The-World-on-your-side.html |
TWEET IT! http://goo.gl/t2uLQ |
BOOKMARK IT!  
|
|---|
Scrape Store
