U.S.A.
Everyone Else
Health
Science
Business
Technology
Sports
Video Games
Entertainment
Future
Humour
NEWS > SCIENCE > GROUP FEARS ZOMBIE JESUS MAY COME BACK FOR HIS DEATH SHROUD
GROUP FEARS ZOMBIE JESUS MAY COME BACK FOR HIS DEATH SHROUD
April 1 2010
Turin, Italy – Throughout the history of religion there has been little or no evidence behind the claims of believers. Whether it was the Greek and Roman Gods or the modern day traditions such as Sikhism or Abrahamic religions, much of the foundation
for belief has been faith, the core of religion. Because no hard evidence exists regarding basic tenets of those religions, they have often been open for attack, particularly in a modern world where secularism is spreading rapidly and though that has not shaken believers, many still seek proof.
For Christianity there has been two pieces of evidence in particular that scholars and believers have held up as evidence for their particular faith, the Dead Sea Scrolls and the Shroud of Turin. Though calling those pieces ‘evidence’ is sketchy by virtually every empirical standard, they have nonetheless become the cornerstone for believers determined to prove that their religion is the one true faith. It is the Shroud of Turin, supposedly a piece of cloth once draped over the body of Jesus after his crucifixion that excites the most attention for believers. Though science agrees that the shroud is indeed real, it also proves that it dates from the 14th century making it impossible to have been the cloth in which Jesus was draped. That of course has not stopped believers including a group that believes the debate over the shroud may anger Jesus and could cause him to once again rise from the dead seeking his death robes.
“We have complete faith that the shroud was the one in which the Lord was buried. It bears his impression. That is the face of the Lord and Saviour, we know it is just as people have known it is for centuries,” said Giuseppe Colombo of GERT. “However the shroud is not something that should be debated. We must have faith for all of mankind otherwise He return to the Earth and rain destruction upon all mankind. The Lord is vengeful and this debate angers Him. We must appease him and cease this debate or he will return the Earth seeking his shroud and destroy whoever stands in his way.”
There is little evidence to suggest that Jesus, who may have ascended to Heaven after his resurrection, is currently on Earth seeking his death shroud or any other mystical item.
“The Shroud of Turin is a unique item in the history of religion. Never before has any religion claimed to have an actual artifact relating to one of the core elements of their religion. They have texts sure, but having a physical piece of evidence would be world changing, like finding life on Mars for scientists,” said Scrape TV Religion analyst Bertram Gas. “The shroud is not that of course. Science and historical documentation have proven that over and over again but that has stopped believers. That of course is religion at its best. Trying to find real evidence of faith, finding that evidence faulty by the people to whom they are trying to offer proof, and simply continuing to believe in it. That is what religion does.”
Though Jesus was resurrected after his death, the gospels debate what happened to him after that return, prompting many to believe that he has been wandering the earth in search of revenge.
“Perhaps, if this group is correct, he has simply been biding his time, waiting for the right moment to strike out against those who doubt him. Obviously the Bible speaks of the return of Jesus and the beginning of the Rapture but this is something else entirely. This is more revenge than return, like the Star Wars movie,” continued. “The real concern here is that this group will try to make this happen because it is a part of their personal theology. The last thing we need is a group of religious nuts trying to bring corpses back to life and wreaking havoc all over Italy. Well, over Italy would be fine but they would have to stop there.”
As yet the group does not appear to have mastered the ability to reanimate dead flesh.
Anna Phillips, Science Correspondent
NEWS > SCIENCE > GROUP FEARS ZOMBIE JESUS MAY COME BACK FOR HIS DEATH SHROUD
LINK IT! http://scrapetv.com/News/News%20Pages/Science/pages-2/Group-fears-Zombie-Jesus-may-come-back-for-his-death-shroud-Scrape-TV-The-World-on-your-side.html |
TWEET IT! http://bit.ly/98Kl6c |
BOOKMARK IT!  
|
|---|
Scrape Store
