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NEWS > SPORTS > RYAN BRAUN PROVES STEROIDS PROVIDE THE BEST CHANCE AT WINNING MVP
RYAN BRAUN PROVES STEROIDS PROVIDE THE BEST CHANCE AT WINNING MVP
December 11 2011
Milwaukee, WI – Cheating in sports has long been anathema to fans. Fair play is deeply embedded in us and, knowing that fairness rarely exists in the real world, often we look to professional sports to give us those things we rarely experience ourselves. This, when cheating is exposed, it is often dealt with harshly in professional sports.
There is no sport where that is more true than in baseball. Cheating scandals in baseball have helped to define the sport, whether it was the Chicago Black Sox scandal or the prohibition of one of the greatest players ever from the sport, cheating in baseball is a deep offence to the spirit of the game. Wel,, most forms of cheating anyways.
Gambling, corked bats, scuffing balls, all those things are severely cracked down on in the sport but, as has been apparent over the last decade or so, some forms of manipulation are more or less perfectly alright, at least when it comes to the manipulating the biology of the athletes themselves, or at least it was. Now reigning National League MVP Ryan Braun, facing a 50-game suspension, is finding out the hard way that some of the rules have changed and that there may be no way of cheating his way out of the punishment. 
“There are highly unusual circumstances surrounding this case which will support Ryan’s complete innocence and demonstrate there was absolutely no intentional violation of the program,” said a spokesperson for Braun. “While Ryan has impeccable character and no previous history, unfortunately, because of the process we have to maintain confidentiality and are not able to discuss it any further, but we are confident he will ultimately be exonerated.”
Braun tested positive for steroids last October, after he had already been awarded the MVP award.
It’s not clear why he would even bothered considering the team he played for, though his performance did give the league a fresh reason to not knock it down to double A status.
“It has become pretty apparent to many people in the league that they have to make an effort to crack down on all forms of performance enhancing drugs because fans really don’t like them. It’s been a hard thing to do because they have allowed so many players to have great success, but ultimately the damage is greater than the benefits,” said Scrape TV Sports analyst Mark Marvins. “I’m sure they don’t want to make an example of Braun and I’m sure they are hoping that he has a really good explanation that will allow them to avoid a suspension, but that isn’t all that likely, unless he took them for religious reasons.”
The Church of Bonds has been growing in power across the league but is not officially sanctioned as yet.
“The league will likely do their best to make sure that they don’t have to do anything about disciplining him I’m sure, but the fans, well the fans get all worked up about steroids and they are ultimately the league’s boss and that makes them obligated to do what they want,” continued Marvins. “It’s a whole lot easier when you are suspending mediocre players though. This is the real test for the league and for fans, suspending good players even if they play for the Brewers.”
Braun will reportedly argue that you can’t even get real steroids in Milwaukee.
Alexi Orton, Sports Correspondent
NEWS > SPORTS > RYAN BRAUN PROVES STEROIDS PROVIDE THE BEST CHANCE AT WINNING MVP
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