HEADLINES

AMERICAN FORCES LAUNCH FRESH ASSAULT ON BRAZILIAN FORCES IN SPIRALING CHOCOLATE WAR Rio de Janeiro, Brazil – US Marines launched a fresh assault against Brazilian forces in the coastal city of Natal. The assault was the latest in a series of advances the US military has made in recent days as they execute ‘Project Xocoatl’, aimed at weakening Brazilian attacks on US held fields and securing chocolate freedom for all Americans

REVAMPED GUANTANAMO BAY STILL SEEKING OCCUPANTS Washington, DC – With more than $400 million spent on the massive renovation of the military detention centre at Guantanamo Bay the United States Government was hoping for big things. But with only 47 detainees, out of a possible 800, critics are starting to question the wisdom of re-opening the once maligned facility. The increasing storm of backlash is being directly targeted at President Tyson and many feel is hurting the Republican push for re-election in 2028

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