CLEVELAND VOLCANO SHOWS SIGNS OF IMMINENT ERUPTION
September 9 2011
Cleveland, OH – Yet another volcano is on the verge of erupting, this one on the remote wilds of Cleveland. The volcano has been showing signs of potential lava leakage and a possible explosive eruption in the next few weeks. Observers have seen the lava dome increase by a third in the last week.
“The presence of the lava dome increases the possibility of an explosive eruption, but does not necessarily indicate that one will occur. Short-lived explosions could produce an ash cloud that exceeds 20,000 ft above sea level,” said a spokesperson for the observatory. It has raised the alert level because of the ever increasing size of the lava dome.
Because of the remote nature of the volcano, it’s not clear what type of problems it could create for residents. Cleveland has over two million people in its metropolitan area.
“This is the first we’ve heard about this. There have been no briefings and no information communicated to us at the Mayor’s office. We will be looking into this situation and we will have a statement when we have more information,” said a spokesperson for the city. Mayor Frank Jacobson is believed to be vacationing in the area near the volcano and officials have been unable to reach him.
“This could be a really devastating volcano, it could really cause a lot of problems for residents and cause a lot of casualties. The people of Cleveland, the people of Ohio in general, are not used to things like volcanoes. Car fires, smog, drug killings are nothing but a volcano is something else entirely,” said Scrape TV American analyst Dave Davidson. “I’m sure that it is going to cause a lot of panic throughout the city and the whole region, all the way into Pennsylvania. These types of things tend to not remain isolated, they tend to explode.”
It’s not clear what type of preparation emergency officials will be able to prepare. It is not believed that the local fire department has any experience combating boiling hot magma.
“We are asking for any type of help people are able to offer. We have had very little experience in this type of thing and we do require aid from outside agencies, preferably people who have dealt with volcanoes before,” said a fire chief who preferred to remain anonymous. “This is very concerning for us. We simply don’t have the facilities, training, or equipment to deal with this type of thing. Heck, we don’t even know where it is and that is going to be trouble.”
The volcano may be closer to Akron, or Toledo, or somewhere else entirely.
“I would imagine that people all across the city are going to be very concerned, hopefully not panicked, until they can track down to the location of this volcano. The last thing anyone wants to have happen is a massive surprise volcano down the street. Expected volcanoes are bad enough, but surprise volcanoes are something else entirely,” continued Davidson. “Any type of surprise disaster is a bad thing and in the case of Cleveland, which traditionally doesn’t respond all that well to anything, it could be a serious problem. At least there isn’t much to destroy, that’s the one advantage they have.”
Officials have not made any recommendations to locals regarding emergency preparations.
Mike Michaels, American Correspondent
Editor’s note: The problem volcano is actually located in remote Alaska. The volcano is named Cleveland, not located in the city. Apologies for any misunderstanding.